considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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