Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
