no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
