Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
