butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize