toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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