Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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