was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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