We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
