Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize