We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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