all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
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