I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
