Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize