i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
