I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
