People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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