When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
