we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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