Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm like, not good at living.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
