the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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