dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
