I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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