Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Drake has all the answers
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
