i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
dude. I can hear the air.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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