As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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