Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I want to be your penis for a week.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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