Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Less talking, more tequila
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
