i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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