She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
