Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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