whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
