My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Oh god it's open bar.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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