She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize