she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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