i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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