I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
