he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
