oh god the rape fog is back!
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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