she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize