i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
