the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize