I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
