i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
