Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
foreskin is a definite game changer
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
