Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
