i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize