I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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