Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
