She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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